- Jessica Klein
- BBC
Young people today do not date or have romantic relationships in the same way as previous generations, so is this younger generation’s approach to relationships more realistic?
“Are you ready to calm down?” That’s the question Kyung-Mi Lee, a student at Yale University, asked in a February 2020 article, “The Solution: Romance in Generation Z,” for the university’s Yale Daily News. Will she and her age follow the same tendency as millennials to postpone marriage?
(Generation Z is the millennial generation and is mostly used to refer to those born in the mid to late 1990s.)
Nearly two years after writing the article, Mi Li felt the answer was “yes” – but for a reason that may be different from other millennia.
“In my cultural imagination, millennials who hate long-term relationships mean that people get into a lot of relationships,” says Mi Li, 23. In other words, it seemed to her that the millennials were waiting to settle down because the millennials were busy making the most of their single life.
As for Generation Z, “People hate long-term relationships because they think a lot about the kinds of relationships they want to enter,” says Mi Li.
An increasing number of research confirms this view: Generation Z seems to have a particularly pragmatic approach to relationships compared to previous generations, and they do not have sex that much.
“They realized they could have different partners at different times in their lives and could meet different needs,” says Julie Arbitt, Vice President of Vice Media Group.
In her research, which examined 500 participants from the United Kingdom and the United States (mostly Gen Z and Millennials), Arbett found that only one in 10 Gen Z members say they are “committed to being committed”.
Other researchers have reached similar conclusions. According to a Generation Z study from India, for example, 66 per cent of study participants agree that “not all relationships will be permanent”, while 70 per cent reject a “limited romantic relationship”.
Among Generation Z, there was an increase in “people willing to explore their sexuality”.
Both researchers and Generation Z members attribute this to a number of factors.
First, this generation is entering adulthood during a very difficult period of coronavirus outbreak, ever-worsening climate change, and financial instability. Many think they need to stabilize before bringing someone else into the picture.
It also has increased access to online relationship information, enabling Gen Z members, in the language they want, to express who they are and what they want from a relationship that does not threaten their identity and needs.
“They are so self-centered, not because they are selfish, but because they know they are responsible for their own success and happiness, and they know they need to be able to take care of themselves before taking care of others.” says Arpitt.
“In the 1960s and 1970s, the average 25-year-old could support a family with his income and not expect his wife to work to help him,” says Stephanie Koontz, director of public research and education at the Council with center in the US. on Contemporary Families. .
To many in Generation Z, the idea that a 25-year-old could provide for an entire family and a man expecting a woman to stay home without a job no longer fits into modern conditions – to some it seems ridiculous.
Instead, Generation Z prioritizes finance, which paves the way for marriage, says Ariel Cooperberg, associate professor of sociology at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, USA, who adds: “People need more time. to calm down now because they need time longer to achieve financial stability.
Mi Li and her friends agree. “This is the most insecure and financially unstable generation in history,” she says, which contributes to their desire for “financial independence” before settling into a long-term partner.
As a college student, Mi Li says she and her friends are more inclined to prioritize their careers over relationships in order to reach a more financially stable place.
“It is rare to hear a friend say, for example, that he will move here to be with his partner,” she says. Instead, they focus on what is best for their job and how they can make the relationship work for them, not the other way around.
Generation Z members report that they focus more on their career to find financial stability before entering into relationships
Cooperberg’s Generation Z research agrees with this, finding that young people who are just starting to build their careers are less likely to enter into formal relationships than millennials.
“I do not think that means they do not want to have long-term relationships, but I think they postpone such relationships,” she says.
In addition, Koperberg found that the current instability of adolescence has pushed more young people to return to live in their parents ’homes because they cannot live on their own in their twenties.
“Informal relationships increased and serious relationships decreased because it became difficult to enter into serious relationships,” she says.
Recently, this is mainly due to the Corona epidemic, which has made it difficult for young people who are unable to live independently.
Cooperberg interviewed a Gen Z man in the spring of 2020 who moved from Washington, DC, to North Carolina with his parents shortly after the blast hit the country. The young man told researchers he would not enter into another relationship before returning to the capital.
A global survey conducted by Vice Media Group since September 2020, entitled “Love After Lockdown”, in which Generation Z made up 45 percent of the participants, showed that 75 percent are currently single and do not meet during the pandemic. Many said this was partly because they wanted to take the time to get to know themselves better before seeking a relationship.
A Gen Z man from Italy said in the survey: “I started thinking to myself, what I want to do and what I do not want to do, and I learned a lot from that.”
A Generation Z woman from the United States said, “I’m physically away from everyone and I can take a step back and say, ‘Who am I?’